Nursing - the gift that keeps on taking

Part One

[Notice: There may be too much information for you here, but someone has to say it!]

I read two books, a couple magazines, and numerous websites in preparation for breast feeding. They say that one of the biggest indicators of a woman continuing to breast feed is whether or not their significant other supports the breast feeding. John was supportive and I also had free access to a Certified Breastfeeding Educator and a Lactation Consultant and other services where I gave birth. I thought that I was prepared.

Everything that I read glossed over any potential difficulty. They provided lots of helpful and supposedly easy solutions to a few common complaints. They also insinuated that if you stopped breastfeeding then you just weren't trying hard enough.

I know several women who breastfed their infants and all of them had significant issues. One baby was projectile vomiting and they thought it was because of the mom's diet. Turns out that the baby had acid reflux. He had to take a prescription medication before each feeding and had to be on extremely expensive speciality formula before he stopped the vomiting.

Another baby's tongue required surgery before he was able to swallow correctly (this would have been a problem without nursing, too), and his mom also had difficulty producing enough milk. So, in order to stimulate milk production, she had to pump in addition to nursing every three hours. (A typical feeding lasts 30-45 minutes.) That is a significant time investment!

In my case, I made more than enough milk and Jacob latched on just fine, but his tongue didn't thrust out correctly so he couldn't get the milk to come out. It took so much effort, that he'd fall asleep after one or two sucks. We tried everything to keep him awake - cell phone vibrating on him, clapping hands near him, undressing him, moving all his limbs - and he just slept on through it. Eventually we found that an ice cube placed between his bare belly & mine did the trick. (My belly did not enjoy that!) We also spent a lot of time with finger feedings, nipple shields, and tongue exercises before Jacob was a successful nurser. And we spent tons of time at appointments with the Lactation Consultant.

The shear exhaustion of being a first-time mom, recovering from an emergency c-section, and getting up every 3 hours to convince Jacob that he wanted to nurse just about did me in. It took about 45 minutes for Jacob to nurse. 45 minutes of sitting and being awake & alert every three hours. The only thing that kept me awake was watching tv, and at 2 am there just isn't anything good on. Thank goodness for MythTV! If John and the Lactation Consultant had not been available, Jacob would have been on formula by his second week of life.

When Jacob was 3 months old I had mastitis. That was a horrible experience! The only thing that kept me nursing after that was the thought of how expensive formula is. I kept asking John to remind me why I was doing this. We did choose together that I would breastfeed because "breast milk is best" and it would dramatically decrease Jacob's chances of developing allergies and asthma. (So much for that, Jacob's been on Claritin since he was 7 months old!)

Also during those late nights, I kept remembering reading about how wonderful breast feeding was, how it was such a bonding experience, how the baby would gaze lovingly into your eyes while they filled up on something your body had made specifically for them. I kept wondering if there was something wrong with me because I had never experienced any of those feelings. Jacob was 5 months old the first time that I didn't feel like it was a struggle to nurse.

From then on breastfeeding got a little easier. I think that it helped to have Jacob sleeping through the night. Not being sleep deprived can immediately brighten ones perspective! It also helped when he started eating solid foods. That meant that I didn't have to nurse him as often, which psychologically felt better.

When Jacob turned 10 months old he was only nursing three times a day. I was really tired of spending my lunch hours pumping, so switched him to formula bottles the three days a week he spent at daycare. Being able to eat lunch without simultaneously pumping felt like such freedom! Also, it is impossible to over-emphasize the importance of a good breast pump!

With the end of nursing in sight, I faced a whole new set of surprising challenges. Stay tuned for Part Two.