Forest of the Plains

I was listening to a story on the radio yesterday about trends in women changing their surname after marriage. I learned that the environment I grew up in is the minority - 80% of women take their husband’s last name. I must know every women who makes up the remaining 20%! :-)

I know women who change to their husband’s last name.

I know women who simply keep their maiden name.

I know women who have been married for 20 years and suddenly stop using their husband’s surname, and go back to their maiden name.

I know women and men who combine their two last names to come up with one unique name.

I know women and men who hyphenate their last names, making one really long name.

I know women and men who keep their last names, but add the other’s last name as a second middle name.

I know women and men who keep their own names, but hyphonate both as their kids’ last names or use the mother’s maiden name as the kid’s middle name.

When I got married, I really thought about what to do. I liked being a Yoder, but I knew from experience that it could get complicated when there are two last names in a family. Ultimately I made a compromise: I took my maiden name as a second middle name. I very rarely use all four names, but it makes me feel better that I’m still a Yoder.

The older I get, and the more times that I have to spell out T-E-R-A-H (pause to let it digest, then a deep breath) G-O-E-R-Z-E-N, the more I miss being a Yoder. “Terah” and “Goerzen” scare people, but they’re usually okay with “Yoder”. I can see myself being one of those women who suddenly changes back to their maiden name after 20 years of marriage, which is probably the most confusing of all the options!