Jacob

We're starting to think about potty training because Jacob seems to be noticing a lot of bathroom-related things. His sense of "potty humor" is already developing - he likes to say "poop" and then laughs. We bought a couple children's books about the potty and I'm looking out for a potty chair at garage sales.

Today I was looking online to get a better idea of the potty chair options and found the Peter Potty Toddler Urinal. It won an iParenting Media Award and claims to be the world's only flushable toddler urinal.

I continue to be amazed at the baby gear products that are available!

Yesterday as we were driving home from the car show at the Mennonite Heritage Museum...

(Let's stop here and consider 1) that the museum was having a car show, 2) that I attended the car show and 3)all the ways this post could go after that opening line.)

...Jacob started saying "cuh, cuh" and motioning forcefully outside. John and I exchanged a look that's becoming more common that means "What in the world is he noticing now?".

Finally John came up with a guess. "Corn field?" Jacob's big smile confirmed that he was indeed noticing the corn field that we drove past.

John asked me how Jacob knew it was a corn field. I replied, "Well, yesterday when we drove past this corn field I told him that it was corn just like in 'Big Red Barn' where 'a field mouse was born in a field of corn'. (pause) Wow. I guess he remembered."

Note to self: Remember that Jacob remembers everything.

Disclaimer: The vast majority of the time Jacob is a very happy and easy-going toddler.

As Jacob becomes taller, more mobile, and increasingly obstinate, his possibilities expand exponentially. It seems like we need to establish new rules for Jacob every day. The most recent rule? If you stuff zucchini into your ears then you are finished eating supper.

I hope I got all the seeds out.

We've also started using a time out mat. We've done time outs for a while now, but were essentially putting him into a basket hold for them. That started to feel like we were giving him negative attention. Jacob has a good attention span and can sit for 5-10 minutes focused on one toy. So, we figured he could developmentally handle sitting on a mat for 2 minutes. (You get one minute of time out per year of age.)

The first time we tried the mat, it was torture for John and me. Well, more for me. John is better at seeing the big picture. I'm so glad that I had watched SuperNanny, so I knew a bit what to expect. SuperNanny is the best!

Jacob knows exactly what the mat is for, but it seems that he wants to make sure that we're aware of the purpose. He'll point to the mat, asking us to name it. "That's the time out mat. That's the tomato timer. When Jacob chooses to not listen, Mom or Dad put Jacob on the time out mat. You stay on the mat until the timer goes 'ding'." Jacob listens to this very carefully and then will deliberately walk over to us. He will hit, kick, or bite us and then, with all the attitude that the best 14-year-old could muster, looks at us like he's saying, "What are you gonna do about that?"

No surprise, he goes onto the time out mat. Except it seems to surprise Jacob. "Wait! I just wanted to make sure! I didn't really mean it!"

Just as important as the time out part is discussing it afterward. This is what makes it discipline and not punishment. After time out, we say something like, "Jacob had time out because he hit Mom. Hitting hurts. Ouch! Jacob does not hit." Then we practice a "gentle touch" - kiss, hug, gentle pat on the arm, petting hair, etc. "Oh, I like gentle touches from Jacob. Thank you for that gentle touch. I love you!"

Interestingly, Jacob doesn't engage in timeout behaviors away from us. At daycare they actually spend time encouraging him to defend his toys and his space. With babysitters and grandparents & at the church nursery they all praise him for being such a good boy. Jacob just tests the people that he knows best - Mom and Dad. If I could only remember that him hitting me is a complement when it happens!